My youngest is now a big brother

I have some pretty meaningful conversations driving or walking around town with my temporary only child until the rest of my brood returns from camp.

It goes to show you that you can have three different kids with three different personalities. First, my daughter has been Miss Contrary since she could speak. Conversations even as seemingly innocuous as the color of the sky can be the beginning of an argument:

“Actually, the sky isn’t all that blue, and look at that cloud over there, so you wouldn’t, couldn’t  say the sky was all blue…”

We are setting aside the funds for law school for that one.

My middle guy? Mr. Silent. You could be on a five hour car ride with hardly a peep.

And, then, my baby…

Take a walk or a car ride and be prepared to answer questions that require much thought. I think he would be great in human resources or interviewing candidates for jobs:

• If you can rename any animal that ever existed, what would you rename, what would you rename it, and why?
• If you could do one thing over in your life, what would it be?
• What is the strangest food you have ever eaten?
• What was your earliest memory and was it scary?

But the clincher, which nearly made me careen my car into oncoming traffic, was:

Mom, will I ever be a big brother?

No, honey, you will never be a big brother

You can’t say that!

I sure can.

No, you can’t say you’re never going to have a baby again. Because, at night, I pray for you that you will have a baby.

Pray for me to have a child? Who does he think I am? Sarah? Rachel??

How do you know you will never have a baby?

Trust me, I just do.

How??

Kid, do I have to spell it out? And if I did, it would start with a “v”

Because you’re too old?

Yes! Yes, that’s right!I’m just too old.

I guess you are getting old. I do see some gray hairs….

Thanks

Do you think you will dye your hair and what color would you dye it….

…and so on.

But today, Toby got to be a big brother fore a whole afternoon to our new neighbor’s little kids. He helped the little boy, nearly two, get on the backyard swings. He chased him around the tree in the front yard. Later, he played with her big sister, all of four. He helped her do a puzzle and read her some books.

A win-win situation had just formed for both parents involved. My neighbor, a stay-at-home dad, put his young son down for a nap and found some rare alone time to read.

Me? I found time to weed my very neglected garden. A perfect late summer afternoon for Toby to be a big brother.